14 Ways To Make Your Tuesday Suck Less

April 29, 2013

i wonder if my girl steph will mention hating tuesdays on her blog today... i really really hope so... because it's true, tuesdays are the worst day of the week.  but, i'm determined not to let today be a bad day, even if everyone else tries to ruin in it.  feel free to also try my 14 ways to make your tuesday suck less.

1. look at this photo of hawkeye.

2. order a frothy creation from starbucks and accept that calories don't count today.  i like anything with raspberry in it.  it makes the drink pink.

3. then order something off the internet.  wolverine hand blades?  jellyfish aquarium?  it is almost mother's day after all.

4. take a nap.  3 hours can still count as a nap.

5. pretend you lost your voice so no one can talk to you all day.

6. unfollow at least 5 annoying facebook or twitter accounts.

7. wash your sheets and then put them directly back on your bed.  no fitted sheet folding, and fresh sheets are awesome.  (and then see #4.)

8. text everyone a question that would normally require a follow up, then don't follow up.  i.e. 'what are you doing tonight?' and when they answer 'nothing, why?'  ignore them for hours.  what, you can at least make people as frustrated as you!

9. make a playlist solely of songs you never, ever skip.  you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner.  i happen to call mine tuesday playlist.  it happens to begin with matchbox 20's 'real world.'

10. repeat this to your favorite 7 year old and enjoy the reaction:
"why are tigger's paws always dirty?"  "because he's always playing with pooh."

11. cross 3 things off your to do list.  not because you've done them, but because you aren't going to.  not today any way.  maybe not ever, if one of those things is clean the kitchen sink or buy toilet paper. (ahem, tara.)

12. download an e-book on your favorite subject, like clothes or diy projects.

13. bake (or buy) chocolate chip cookies you have no intention of sharing.

14. watch episodes of your favorite 90s shows, which are still good by the way.  i recommend clarissa, salute your shorts, and hey dude. all of which can be found in their entirety online.

have a great tuesday!

My Weekend in Photos

April 28, 2013

well it certainly was eventful!

my little princess turned four.

my boyfriend kind of rocks. (this is after he told me that hungover and in sweats in the above photo is the most beautiful he's ever seen me.)

and of course, bar crawl. (more on this on thursday for the party don't start til i walk in link up!)

i guess that's as good a way as any to start a monday, but i'd still rather have 5 day weekends and 2 day work weeks.

Whipped Cream Vodka Cupcakes

April 24, 2013

for this week's the party don't start til i walk in link up, i'm bringing you the recipe for the mini cocktail cupcakes i made for betsy's birthday!

whipped vodka frosting mini birthday cupcakes!  these babies are pretty easy - i mixed white boxed cake mix with 12 ounces of diet sprite.  put them in the adorable pampered chef mini cupcakes pan i coincidentally ordered from betsy a few months ago and baked at 350 for about 10 minutes.  yes, it's that easy.

for the frosting, i mixed 1 8 oz room temperature block of cream cheese, 1 pint of heavy whipping cream, and 6 tablespoons (ish) of whipped cream flavored vodka.  and the whipped the crap out of it, so don't try this by hand!  you need a mixer!

cream cheese stabilizes whipped cream frosting, so it doesn't melt if you leave it out for long periods (which we did.  all night.)

now, go make some!

and link up your party posts with chelsee and i!  pretty much anything party related goes.


rules: there are only 3
1) follow both Southern Beauty Guide and Bourbon and Glitter. (at least, we hope you will! we like you!)
2) click on the link below to enter your blog.
3) go visit other blogs saying hello and that you are stopping by from this linkup!

7 Warnings For My Future Husband

April 23, 2013

let's just get these out of the way now, shall we?

i'm probably always going to love this dog more than you.  she was here first.

when my sports team loses, so does everyone around me.  i'm used to the crap that is the cubbies, but i'm an angry little elf when the hawkeyes or bears lose.  (also, every sunday is spent lying on the couch watching nascar, hungover.)

i hate waiting.  i am terrible at waiting.  i'll probably cut you if you're always late or slow.

i do not, in any way, function before coffee.

i could eat taco bell for every meal.  i'd prefer it, really.  i could also eat cereal for dinner every night and be perfectly content.  so home cooked meals are going to be a rare occasion unless you make them for yourself.

i've been known to toss hawkeye out of the bed if she wakes me up before 7 am.  so this obviously goes for everyone else too.

this is exactly how i feel about children:

but hey, there's 3 really positive things too:

i make perfect pancakes, baked goods, and any type of eggs... first time, every time.  i'm talking restaurant perfect.  so breakfast.  i can make perfect breakfast.

i never make you carry things.  i have god's pockets to stash my keys, phone, money, etc.

i'm not afraid of bugs, so i won't make you kill anything.  i take them outside. (as long as it's only 1 spider at a time.  more than 1 is like them starting an army, i don't like that.)

i mean really, i'm still pretty awesome.

Where To Pick Up Men in Chicago

April 22, 2013

i know women think it's harder to meet men once you're out of college, but i really don't think that's the case.  i've been having a lot of fun these last 3 months and not just pick up a random guy at a trashy bar at 2 am type fun, but actual dating.  so i thought i'd take a minute to share my top locations for finding cute men in chicago:

sluggers (a bar in wrigleyville).  particularly, the area upstairs with the batting cages.  as tara said "walking in there, just us 3 girls?  it's like ringing a dinner bell."  anywhere with testosterone fueled games like batting cages, rock climbing walls, and driving ranges is guaranteed to be mostly men.  especially sluggers, because they have to wait in a decently long line and the batting cages are surrounded by carnival games so you actually look like you're doing something instead of just scoping out guys.

wrigley field/united center/soldier field.  guys and sports, what can i say?  but going to the stadium is generally better than going to just a sports bar.  sports bars can be hit or miss.  at the actual game, you can chat with guys near you about horrible calls or ask them to explain a play - but only during a break, i cannot stress that enough.  no chatting during the actual playing time.  you can also bond over the horrible long lines to get beer, how frickin cold it is if you're outdoors (because it always is in chicago), how much you hate whatever team the chicago team is playing against.

houndstooth bar on country night.  i can't even explain why this is such man magnet, but it is.  thursday nights at houndstooth are packed and if you have a table and a deck of cards, i guarantee a group of guys at your table within 20 minutes.  card games always attract guys, because it's an easy in for them to start talking to you.  if i had a nickel for every time i've heard "soooo what're you playing?" i'd have enough to afford all the $6 pitchers tara and i consume in one night there.  they don't care what you're playing, they just want to talk to you.  really.

happy hour in the loop.  let's be honest, women like men who have jobs.  so i highly recommend happy hours in the loop, especially fridays.  grab a girl friend and head to: salseria in the sears tower, ceres in the board of trade building, brando's near the federal building, and meet all the men who work in said locations.  i've probably had the best luck with my friend julie at south branch.  i also recommend monk's on lake street for being guy friendly because you can throw your (free) peanut shells on the floor and this makes everyone really happy when they're drinking.

and from some of my favorite guys, who i surveyed via gchat before i posted this, on where they go to meet women (thanks guys):

"argo tea, especially during finals time, near a college campus like depaul or a law school campus like northwestern." - brandon

"dog parks, parks in general.  my dog is a chick magnet, she's got great game." - eric

"we did used to always go to target when we were in college.  or whole foods/trader joe's, those have younger women.  you don't pick up a steady girl when she's stoned at a concert." - bill

"summer time is definitely the beach, cause you are getting a preview beforehand." - kiernan (yes, kiernan my gay friend.)  i would also add, there is lots of potential to meet people at the oak street beachstro and castaways, the little bars on two major beaches downtown.  so he is right!

now you know.  you're welcome.  and happy hunting.

The Party Don't Start Til I Walk In (Secret Shame Photos)

April 17, 2013

welcome to the very first post of the weekly link up hosted by myself and Chelsee of Southern Beauty Guide!

i'm keeping my very first The Party Don't Start Til I Walk In post short(er) and sweet so everyone has time to write and link up their party posts and to visit the other blogs.  and by short and sweet i mean photos.  not just any photos - the really awesome ones.

time to link up your party posts! remember, everyone who links up today gets 1 month free large or medium ad space with me! (your choice) there will also be a bigger prize for a randomly selected winner.  thanks for your support!  and see you next week, of course.

Rules: There are only 3

1) Follow both Southern Beauty Guide and Bourbon and Glitter. (at least, we hope you will!  we like you!) 
2) Click on the link below to enter your blog. 
3) Go visit other blogs saying hello and that you are stopping by from this linkup!

(i'm hoping everything will go smoothly but this is both mine and Chelsee's first time with LinkyTools so we'll fix any bugs that come up asap.)

5 Things It'd Be Awesome If People Stopped Doing

April 16, 2013

reminder: tomorrow (well, thursday, if you're reading this tuesday night) is the first day of the weekly The Party Don't Start Til I Walk In link up with Chelsee and i!!  we're really excited to see all your posts.  the link up will go live wednesday night, 7 pm central time, and will be open for you to link up your posts through sunday night.  hope you'll join us!  and of course, as mentioned, you'll get 1 month free ad space from me for linking up and there will also be a bigger prize for one randomly chosen winner.

as Steph knows, things are infinitely more annoying on tuesdays.  so after a long tuesday, i start to list things in my head that it'd be really great if people stopped doing.  come on guys, it'll make me tuesdays better.  maybe?

pinning things without making sure the link works or finding the correct link.  nothing is more frustrating than being unable to find the instructions for that fantastic cake you just pinned.

giving me a little cup of cheese for my nachos.  i ordered nachos, not chips.  i basically want a giant plate of cheese, get on that.

pretending you never saw jersey shore.  i'm tired of explaining when i use abbreviations.  you know what dtf is, probably even gtl, so stop acting like you're too good for guidos.  (and thanks Kat for turning me on to awkward abbreviations as well!)

however, (guidos), it would be awesome if people stopped wear affliction and ed hardy shirts in any way other than ironically.  know who ed hardy loves?  jon, from jon and kate plus 8.  chew on that for awhile.  i'm really glad it seems that girls have finally given up those trucker hats.

leaving me voicemails.  that little number on the bottom of my iphone is just getting higher and higher.  it's a badge of honor at this point.

at least it's wednesday now.

Yeah, Me Neither

April 15, 2013

do you ever....

listen to justin bieber on full blast in your best friends car and belt out "i was like baby baby baby"... when you're 27?

count successfully keeping yourself and the dog alive as productive enough for one day?

cry when you're home alone for no other reason than the sarah mclaughlin anti cruelty society commercial comes on?

change the radio station/tv channel to something 'cooler' if someone else is going to be around?

eat an entire pint of ben and jerry's ice cream in one sitting?

spend inordinate amounts of time scrolling through animated gifs on the internet?

sing along to christmas music when it's not christmas and also maybe the music is just in your head?

watch movies made for 10 year old girls, like anything staring the Olsen twins, past the age of 10?

try on 14 outfits to go out, finally settling on the first one you tried on anyway?

remember the lyrics to various Hanson songs?

eat 3 bites of something while standing in front of the fridge before deciding you're not hungry enough to get proper utensils to eat more?

make up semi-important reasons to get off the phone but really, your show is on?

buy new underwear instead of doing laundry?

drop your phone on your face because you're tweeting while laying down?

play candy crush?

... yeah, me neither.

Pros and Cons of Baseball Season

April 8, 2013

the cubs home opener was today.  anyone want to guess what happened?  if you guessed that they won, you would be wrong.  don't ever guess that the cubs won, you'll always be wrong.  (surprisingly, the cubs actually have a winning record, 492 more wins than losses.  i'm shocked too.)  it's days like these that have me remembering just how painful it is to be a cubs fan.

the pros and cons of baseball season in chicago (for a cubs fan)

pro: the location
the bleachers at and rooftops surrounding wrigley field are probably some of the most fun places you could ever end up at in your life.  sunshine, booze, other rowdy fans who are entirely mostly just there for said booze, cute outfielders, and the option to get a giant pile of nachos served to you in a blue baseball helmet.  and happy little kids whose souls haven't been crushed yet by:

con: the letdown
being a cubs fan.  28 years of loyalty has gotten me nothing but disappointment, a tolerance for smack talk from white sox fans, and an affinity for old style in a can.  those happy little kids have some painful years ahead of them.  this is probably why wrigley field is surrounded by at least 47 bars within walking distance. (walking distance in stephanie world being a mile or less.)

pro: the outfits
if i could always go out in tube socks, sneakers and t-shirts, i'd be the happiest person alive.  and you know how i love a theme.

con: the weather
seriously though, they build covered stadiums in texas and not chicago?  that makes sense...  at least baseball season isn't mountains of snow like bears games, but still. most days it's just too hot to enjoy yourself in the bleachers and the other days it's pouring rain and you just have to sit there and wait to see if it stops.  there's shockingly few perfect baseball weather days in this town.

at least it's always perfect weather in the bar though.  (this is Megan and i in the rain, outside the bar. seemed like a cute photo op at the time.)

pro: the players
with a few notable exceptions (i'm looking at you, carlos zambrano, and i hate you too), cubs players love being cubs players.  they're friendly, they're hilarious, they love the fans, they take losing in stride, and they are really, really attractive.  michael barrett, my personal favorite, would buy us pizza every time we ran into him at giordano's (which, fair enough, was all the time because he went there after every game and we may or may not have stalked him.  but when you punch out a sox player, i love you for life.)

"when i get angry i stop and think... what would michael barrett do?"

con:  the actual team
at the end of the day, the fact is this:  we cannot win.  we can blame a goat curse all we want but sometimes we need to admit the team just sucks.  5 states have joined the union since the cubs won the world series.  harry caray was born and died.  man landed on the moon.  at some point, fans just need to accept that it isn't going to happen again.

sigh.  at least i look good in blue and can shotgun old style tallboys in mere seconds.

5 Ways to Waste Time

April 2, 2013

i'll be honest with you, this week is already kicking my butt.  i know it's only been two days but work has been crazy and for some reason there's just a lot of other things on my to do list.  skipping today's post was happening.  it usually gets posted at 7 pm (chicago time) and Tara promptly asked me at 7:02 where my post was.  she was disappointed in my decision and decided to come up with a post for you so you wouldn't feel abandoned.  she cares.

take it away Tara.


Howdy all!

As law school draws to a close, I find myself with lots of nervous energy and time because I am actively avoiding school work and sleep is actively avoiding me.  Hours of random internet searching has taught me a lot interesting useless facts. Also some gems of the internet have been discovered. As a guest post I decided to share some of my favorite internet time wasters!

1 “I’m Feeling Lucky” button
For those of you who have never tried it this is an ADHD dream come true. Go to the Google search page. Instead of typing something in the search box and hitting the “Google Search” button, just hit the “I’m Feeling Lucky” button on the right. You never know what you are going to get. (This may be hit or miss, but I can entertain myself for a couple of hours around 3-4 a.m. just by hitting this button over and over again)

2 Netflix
I know a lot of people love Netflix but seriously I watch it for hours every day at this point. Such classics as Stippers v. Werewolves as available at the click of a button! (But seriously I have seen Tucker and Dale v. Evil at least a dozen time cause it is my favorite movie on Netflix) If you haven’t checked out Metalocalypse, and The Tick you are missing out. Also suggests are always appreciated because I may have seen everything on Netflix….

3 Dog Shaming
This site is always being updated and is hilarious. Hawkeye feels no shame for any of her actions, so it always makes me giggle to see dogs pretending to be ashamed [we all know dogs don’t feel shame. Why should they? Such cuteness should never be ashamed. This is a rule I choose to live by ;) ]

I have tried to use tumblr as a blogging site (you may notice Steph tries to keep linking up to mine http://flutteraboutbabe.tumblr.com/, but I am so scatterbrained I keep forgetting to post), but I mostly like just viewing some of the great tumblr sites out there. Some of my favs, in no particular order are…  http://whatshouldwecallme.tumblr.com/,

5  Happy Place 
      Last but not least… http://www.happyplace.com/
This site is dedicated to collections of things on the internet. Want the best Craigslist Roommate Ads all in one place? Check here. Want to see Creepy Easter Bunnies? Check here. Want to see the best facebook fails? Check here. It is also linked up to Someecards which are always funny. I like to send Steph random someecards for a random mid-day giggle sometimes J

And there you have some of my favorite interest time wasters. May they give you at least a few minutes of enjoyment!


and 6, making last minute guest posts for your LLBFF's blog.  thanks for the save Tara, i don't know what my readers would have done without you.  (sorry i couldn't make your photos work, i'll possibly figure it out later.)

now, thank Tara for all the time you waste today.

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