1. girls who proudly proclaim they have no female friends cannot be trusted. ever. it's one thing to have more male friends or to generally get along with guys better. that's true for me. but women need other female friends, even if it's just one great one, and any girl who says "i don't have any girl friends, i just don't get along with girls" like it's a badge of honor to not have these friends cannot be trusted and is psychotic. so run far, far away. there is no exception to this rule.
3. like saying you have no female friends, anyone who says they don't like any animals also cannot be trusted. none?? dogs, cats, dolphins, frogs, elephants, lizards, horses, cows, bluebirds, electric eels - you can't think of one non human creature you like? nope, cannot. be. trusted. you know who didn't like animals? jeffrey dahmer. and ted bundy.
4. i do not believe that "if you have nothing nice to say you shouldn't say anything at all." i do believe that some people are stupid and others are just plain mean. if it's my job to point it out to you because you fail to notice that the rest of society hates you for acting like an idiot most of your life, so be it.
5. all doors, but especially bathroom doors, need to be push to exit, not push to enter. you have way too much faith in humanity if you honestly think they all wash their hands before touching the bathroom door handle to pull it open. stop making my life hard! p.s. i thought all doors are supposed to be push to go out anyway, ya know, in case of fires. apparently that's a lie...
6. car alarms need to just stop. when's the last time you even looked when one went off? exactly.