yes, i hosted and survived tour de franzia 2013.
tour de franzia is where you go to your local liquor store and buy a ton of boxed wine all at once so everyone stares at you weird but then smiles and announces what a great time you're about to have.
and then you go to the nearest salvation army and buy a pink disney princess tricycle.
then you invite your friends over and make them play various drinking games like quarters baseball, chugging contests, card games, and slap the bag because you must consume the equivalent-of-33-bottles-of-wine you just bought in 6 hours.
and then of course, since it's called tour de franzia, you make them drunk race the tricycle around your apartment complex and pool in front of strangers while yelling 'i'm a pretty pretty princess.'
and this is what they look like after they do this.
and that is how you host your very own tour de franzia. this weekend, if you'd like it to coincide with the real tour de france.
i even have a pink tricycle you can have...