i'm in the process of (actually, fully this time) completing jillian michael's 30 day shred. mostly - fine, solely - so i can check 'complete a fitness challenge' off my 101 list. fitness gurus always claim 'it'll get easier, you'll really start to like exercising after awhile, you'll come to crave it on the days you don't do anything' - no. lie after lie after lie. the more i do it, the more i hate it and i'm fairly certain that those people who say "oh i can't go 2 days without my workout!" are psychologically unhinged. ahem. kathy. 100% true statement - i'd rather eat worms or get a cavity filled than exercise.
so here's what i learned about exercising so far (and this from someone who did every sport imaginable as a youth and still hates all of them):
-it's better to do it in the morning. then the worst is over and you literally have nothing to face all day that could possibly be more awful. i don't do this, i save it for after work and yes, i spend all day dreading it. but i cannot will myself awake any earlier than i already do.
-there is no path of least resistance. it all sucks so just accept it and stop letting people talk to into trying new things you 'might like.' you won't. figure out what workouts you can complete and do them. it doesn't get any better, there is no magical greener pasture. just more brown dead grass and the sooner you realize that and stop chasing the mythical non-sucking workout, the better.
-don't waste money on cute clothes. it makes no difference and while you might think 'rewarding' yourself with cute running shoes or sports bras is suddenly going to make you like working out, you're lying to yourself. that's like saying that buying organic, expensive whole foods broccoli is going to make you like broccoli more. it's still fucking broccoli.
-you might as well instagram the shit out of your polar watch because the most enjoyment you're going to get from your workout is the likes on your photo.
-motivational quotes are still lies, my friend. 'no one ever regretted a workout'?!? last week alone i regretted 6 workouts. guess how many times i worked out.
-yeah yeah yeah. you want to 'feel good' or 'wear a bikini' or 'drop a dress size.' good luck with that. the only real motivator is hatred. you have to pick someone you can't stand and want to look better than they do. tape their photo to the treadmill if you have to.
sorry fitness lovers out there. i'm just never going to be one of those people.