dearest netflix, let's discuss some things. i could write you a love letter, but that would be boring and i'm sure you get plenty of those anyway. i do love you, heck, you come in just under nachos but way above above sliced bread. that's high praise, my friend. but there's always room for improvement, isn't there? i only share my ideas and criticism because i want you to grow, netflix, and be the best you can be. that's what friends do. don't worry, it's not a long list.
- have an option to turn off the 'continue?' are you still watching function. it feels like judgment, netflix. yes, i just watched 5 episodes of gilmore girls in a row. thanks for the bathroom break reminder but indeed, i'm still here.
- boy meets world. every season. it needs to happen. you already know that you need to stream every show that aired on tgif, right? well, i think you should start with boy meets world.
- can we also do a 90s nickelodeon tv shows update? salute your shorts, hey dude, and legends of the hidden temple would be fab. if i can get greedy for a minute, i also wouldn't complain about you adding clarissa, alex mack, pete and pete, and guts.
- from there, let's do the disney channel original movies. i've seen xenon more recently than any 90s tv show, but i'd still appreciate seeing her on netflix. i own brink, of course, but it's been years since i've seen johnny tsunami, smart house, the luck of the irish, or motocrossed. (you can skip wish upon a star, though. katherine heigl was just as annoying back in 1996.)
- do you know how many nicolas cage movies there are in the world? 78. do you know how many are on netflix? 8. it's a travesty. fix this. i need to watch ghost rider as often as if i still had cable and tuned it to fx any day of the week. i appreciate all the danny trejo, i really do, but come on. nic cage.
- the organization needs work. i mean specifically the organization of my list of 'to be watched' things. it's very long. can we break this up, use some sub-lists? i need 'things to watch with john' and 'all things wwe' and 'things i'm going to watch even though i'm not 10 any more.'
- can we earn points? look, i watch a lot of netflix, okay? i'm not hiding it here. i also like to be rewarded. so... let's discuss points. i'd like some points for every hour of netflix or every new show or whatever. points that can be redeemed for things like unlocking new shows or a dollar off each month. maybe i can earn enough points that you'd let me watch season 3 of orange is the new black a week before the commoners who don't watch 20+ hours of your shows all weekend, because that's what friends do. reward the loyalty, netflix. which brings me to my last point,
- i'm sure this goes without saying, but just in case - don't raise fees. $7.99 is cool. remember when you split the services and increased prices and there was an uproar? let's just try some smooth sailing for awhile. at $7.99 a month.
all those things would be fabulous updates. let's do this. and thanks for the good times, netflix. love ya like a sister. or how i imagine i'd love a sister, if i weren't an only child.