The Post No One Wants to Write

March 28, 2018

And that no one wants to read either probably, but here we are.

Am I supposed to write something about trigger warning here?  Explain how this is not my usual light and fluffy posts about organizing closets and saving money?  Well, I don't care, because today is not about you, special snowflake.

Yesterday morning, my uncle killed himself.  There's no nice euphemisms being used here.  He didn't 'pass away.'  He stood in front of a train at 5:50 in the morning, on purpose.

We have no details and no answers.  Feel free to google 'Barrington train news.'  There, you now know as much as we do.  Because that's the thing about suicide, you never get the answers you need.

It took them about 6 hours to ID him and contact my aunt.  I've mentioned my aunt before, briefly, she's the one who has stage 4 oral cancer and no, there's no good news on that front or I would have mentioned it.  3 hours after that we made it to her house, with my parents, John, and my 3 cousins, his children.  Which, by the way, is my entire family.

We cried a lot and everyone is in shock.  Our entire lives have changed and no one has any clue what to do from here.  What do you do?  Call a funeral home?  They go get the body.  Is there much of a body left to get?  Are we allowed to?  There's an investigation, is it evidence?  Can we have a funeral, it's Easter weekend, they probably don't allow funerals on Good Friday?  And those are just the immediate logistical questions.  I can't even make a list of all the questions that come up about what happens next week, next month.  Who moves in with my aunt?  She can't be in that house alone, she's too sick.  What do we do for Easter?  Because that's right, he won't be here for Easter.  Or Father's Day.  Or Christmas.  Or for my aunt's recovery, or if she doesn't recover.  Or his daughter's wedding.  Or his grandson's kindergarten graduation.

I'm sad for my aunt and my cousins.  But I'll be honest here.  I'm mostly just angry.  Really, really angry.  And I'm sure that's not very PC of me, I'm sure I'm supposed to be saying 'depression is a monster, you can't think, it's their only way out.'  And all that is true, but I'm still angry because suicide is incredibly fucking selfish.  Dying is easy.  Your problems are over.  You put everything on the people you leave behind and it's selfish.  I mean, if anyone is allowed to kill themselves here, it's my aunt, the one with the actual cancer.  Not him.

There was no note that's been found, but I think we all assume it's about the cancer.  How does killing yourself make my aunt better?  That stress is only going to set her back.  If she's optimistic enough to not be killing herself, what gives you the right to do this to her?  And aren't your kids going through enough?  And jesus the poor train conductor, that's a worst nightmare situation that he has to relive now forever too.  Selfish.

I don't know, I'm ending the post there.  I should probably leave all these depression hotline numbers or something, but I won't.  You don't have to leave a comment, I won't respond to them anyway.  I'd turn them off but I don't know how so I won't be doing that either.  I have no idea if I'll let tomorrow's post go up as normal, we'll see.



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Why We Buy Things We Don't Need

March 27, 2018

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Well it took almost 3 months but I have what I consider my first real shopping ban violation.  For any newcomers, 2018 is the year of no shopping for me.  I set very specific rules in place and although I've been spending money on some things like food and bills, the rules definitely state that there's to be no spending on 'stuff.'  Which is exactly what I did, $29 worth of 'stuff.'


Why?  Well that's an interesting question, isn't it.  It wasn't something I needed, particularly not in that exact moment (I could I have waited.)  Not really all that important, but I bought it anyway and even went out to the store with the intention of getting it.  Which is very unlike me indeed.  So I started wondering why we do this so often, why we buy things we don't need.  Because we're all guilty of it.  And I think it comes down to a few mental traps that get us wiping the wallet out:



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House to Home: Organized Linen and Medicine Cabinets

March 26, 2018

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Three on Thursday - Weekly Favorites

March 22, 2018

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Welcome back to Three on Thursday, a weekly list of three things I'm loving at the moment that I think you should do, try, or buy.  If you're interested in past weeks and more recommendations, you can find those here.  If you make your own Three on Thursday list, please share it in the comments so I can check it out.



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My Minimalist Skin Care Lineup

March 21, 2018

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I promise that picture will make sense in a minute!

Like everything else in my life, my skin care has to be minimalist too.  And clean, and cruelty free.  Since I already updated you on my minimalist makeup collection here, it seemed like sharing the clean and natural skin care lineup was next up.  Not that I don't believe in a multitude of great skin care products - there's tons.  And they do work.  I just don't remember to use them all and don't see a difference in my own skin when I do.  So I stick to my basics and I find that my skin is responding really well.  Which means I'll keep chugging along, because if it ain't broke, don't fix it.




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10 Vintage Skills That Save Money

March 20, 2018

That's what these are called now, 'vintage skills.'  Because it's been so many years since people regularly did these things, but really, it wasn't that long ago that we used to be so much more self-sufficient.  And if you missed it on my (very long!) post on Friday, it's on my goal list to learn one of these vintage skills, because they really can save money.  Now, I love modern conveniences as much as the next girl, and I don't feel the need to unnecessarily complicate my life just for the sake of going back to how things used to be done.  Not every update has been a winner (fast fashion and everyone's inability to sew a button back on their clothing), but not every old skill is either (it is, in fact, cheaper to buy bread than make it, for example).  So here are a few of the vintage skills that save money that I'm thinking about learning more about, before I pick which one I want to commit to.




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My New 101 in 1001 List

March 16, 2018

The time has arrived to share my brand new 101 in 1001 list.  My third round of this is about to start on April 1 (it overlaps with my second list by a month, because I wanted the end date at the end of 2020 instead of in the beginning of 2021.)  Isn't that crazy?  Time flies.  And I just love making new lists of goals.


If you have no clue what I'm talking about, it's exactly what it sounds like - 101 goals I plan on accomplishing in the next 1001 days, about 2.75 years.  I do all of my updates and tracking using the Day Zero Project website, but I like to share my list here at the beginning because I know other people are always looking for 101 in 1001 ideas and categories as well.  Lord knows I was when I was trying to come up with 101 ideas for the third time.  So let's jump in.

By the way, this post is long.  Grab a coffee.  After each goal (which are in bold), I also have a bit of a description on my thought process.  I think the why behind each goal is just as important as the goal itself.  I thought about splitting the post in two, but I figure people who care would like it all in one place and people who don't would prefer just one post to have to skip.  If you want to just see the goals without all the text after, you can do so at the Day Zero site.



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Three on Thursday - Weekly Favorites

March 15, 2018

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Welcome back to Three on Thursday, a weekly list of three things I'm loving at the moment that I think you should do, try, or buy.  If you're interested in past weeks and more recommendations, you can find those here.  If you make your own Three on Thursday list, please share it in the comments so I can check it out.



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10 Things You're (Probably) Not Cleaning

March 14, 2018

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So we addressed the common types of clutter and spring cleaned the worst ingredients out of our skincare and makeup.  Next up: 10 things in your house you're probably not cleaning.  If you're going to do this whole spring clean thing, you might as well do it right and make sure you add these germ magnet areas to your cleaning to do list.


These are the things that I've noticed most people don't even think to clean, at least not very often.



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Ingredients to Avoid in Beauty Products

March 13, 2018

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You know what else needs to get spring cleaned, besides the 10 types of clutter I talked about yesterday?  The ingredients in the products you put on your body.  When you really dive into the world of more natural skin care and start learning about exactly what it is they're putting in makeup and moisturizer... yikes.  Companies put a lot of nasty things in there, chemicals that are known to be irritating or disrupting to our hormones, and we really don't know how these will affect us long term because they haven't been around very long.  




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10 Common Types of Clutter to Spring Clean

March 12, 2018

Anyone else getting the spring cleaning itch?  It's getting slightly warmer here, which always makes me want to clean things.  Even my mom is talking about getting rid of more things out of her house (yay!), because you can't do a good spring clean if you don't first start by getting out the items you don't need.  Spring cleaning often means physical clutter, but I think there's much more to decluttering and simplifying your life than just donating the extra toaster you haven't used in two years.  If you're getting a similar spring clean itch, I hope this list can guide you towards some other things to clear out of your life that you might not have considered.  Of course, this isn't an exhaustive list of all the things you could possibly declutter from your life.  It's just a guide of some common ones, ones that can get you started if you're feeling overwhelmed and wanting to simplify your life.



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Three on Thursday - Weekly Favorites

March 8, 2018

This post may contain affiliate links.

Welcome back to Three on Thursday, a weekly list of three things I'm loving at the moment that I think you should do, try, or buy.  If you're interested in past weeks and more recommendations, you can find those here.  If you make your own Three on Thursday list, please share it in the comments so I can check it out.



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Monthly Decluttering Project: Linen/Medicine Cabinet

March 7, 2018

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I consider our 'linen cabinet' to be part of our bathroom since it is actually in John's bathroom, but I know a lot of people have a separate closet for these things, or keep them in the bedroom closet.  In general, I'm talking about things like sheets and towels, including beach towels and guest bedding.  And I know that this space is often combined for people with medication and first aid supplies.  Just the way people have always organized their homes, I guess!




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What I Actually Do When I'm Sick

March 5, 2018

Of course, after my ridiculous February, I get massively sick.  I ended up leaving work at about 2 in the afternoon on Thursday, went to sleep around 5 and didn't get up again until Saturday morning.  So rough.  I suck at being sick, because it never happens.  It used to happen all the time, but I've had almost every organ removed that you can without dying (tonsils, appendix, gall bladder) so I don't get sick much any more.  In fact, John can't recall a time that I've been this sick since we've been dating, so in 5 years, this is my first time getting sick.  And I've been a big, huge, dramatic baby about it.


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Shopping Ban Update and March Goals

March 2, 2018

I just don't love March as a month.  I do love seeing Steph's birthday month fun, of course, but March in Chicago means spring and I don't like spring, because spring leads to summer and I dislike summer even more than I dislike spring.  Give me winter and snow year round, please.  But March has arrived and with it some new goals.


Of course, let's start with the February update.  Because that's a little rough.



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Three on Thursday - Weekly Favorites

March 1, 2018

This post may contain affiliate links.

Welcome back to Three on Thursday, a weekly list of three things I'm loving at the moment that I think you should do, try, or buy.  If you're interested in past weeks and more recommendations, you can find those here.  If you make your own Three on Thursday list, please share it in the comments so I can check it out.



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